Hornets 105, Wolves 80: Why does Mickey Rourke wear sleeveless T’s?

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This isn’t something I normally do, but I was watching that UFC fight night on Fox Sports 1 Sunday night. I’m not a UFC or MMA person. It really doesn’t appeal to me. I used to love boxing and will still watch the big fight cards but I definitely don’t keep up with it like I did in the 90’s. That’s probably because the quality of the product, especially with the heavyweight division is just so down. Perhaps that’s another blowout recap for another day though.

I was at a restaurant, enjoying some lovely ribs on a patio and they had the UFC card on all of the televisions. The NFL games were done and the NBA was smart enough to not schedule against the night of the conference championships in the NFL. Once the action from both leagues was done, the fights were on and I had an apple crisp to put down. During the fight, the camera flashed a picture of Mickey Rourke on the screen. He was wearing an odd hat, had some odd hair, and that meant it was time for Twitter to have a little fun with it.

And fun we had. 

I made a joke about how Mickey Rourke looks like Jane Lynch.

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Friend and great follow for life Robby Kalland also made a joke about a new episode of Glee coming up for Rourke and the jokes were off. Instead of the jokes continuing on Twitter, Robby texted me “Why’s Mickey Rourke gotta be out here looking like your vegan aunt that tries to ruin thanksgiving with tofu” and we spent the next hour or so entertaining ourselves.

I made a joke about a motorcycle sidecar. Robby made a joke about a bluegrass show. We went from Whole Foods to juice shops to all kinds of businesses Mickey Rourke’s new persona could be caught up in with his new look. And these were how the text messages went:

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It’s not that we were making fun of him necessarily or the way he looks as a person; it’s just that the look with the hat and the hair was so shocking to the eyes. Rourke has changed his look so many times over the years, either via midlife crisis or movie role. But the change is startling each time. Once the jokes get rolling, it no longer becomes about the person. Rather, it becomes about trying to keep up with your friends and see how creative you can be.

Some could argue none of this is funny or creative, while others loved it and wanted to play along. A friend of mine from high school asked why Rourke was trying to look like a Muppet Eric Roberts. Another person asked why Mickey was holding a “world is coming to an end” cardboard sign. It was finding hilarity in the simplest of things and challenging our minds to try to make it even funnier for ourselves.

What does any of this have to do with basketball?

Nothing really. I guess you could have watched the second and third quarters of the Wolves against the Hornets and made your own jokes. The Wolves were so bad and uncompetitive in those quarters, getting outscored by a score of 60-32 that you could have asked when Randy Wittman took over the team again or what kind of geometrical shapes Kurt Rambis was trying to employ or why Darko Milicic was wearing a Gorgui Dieng costume or why Mo Williams was drafted sixth over Steph Curry or why Andrew Wiggins was getting playing time over Wes Johnson or anything Wolves-ian by nature.

There could have been a lot of jokes to amuse yourself in such a bad game for your favorite team. Or you can just ignore the score in the .gif below and watch Glenn Robinson III help Zach LaVine take flight.

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But seriously, why is Mickey Rourke auditioning for Brad Pitt’s role in Snatch 15 years after it was released?

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