Archives For Uptempo DNA

Choo choo… choo choo, baby

Zach Harper —  December 30, 2011 — 4 Comments

You know the old saying, “when the going get tough, the tough get out and run in transition?”

Well, the Miami Heat are tough and they like to get out and suffocate you with their transition offense. It’s not even really so much a transition offense as it is a locomotive coming at you in one of those old-timey Westerns. Their opponents get careless with the ball and essentially tie themselves to the tracks and allow the Heat to twist their mischievous and villainous mustaches as they wait for the 3:10 to Yuma to come barreling through.

In three games this season, they’ve already amassed 70 fastbreak points against their opponents. They had 31 in a Christmas day blowout win over the Mavericks, 19 in a much more modest win against the Celtics, and 20 in a nail-biter against the lowly but equally scrappy Bobcats. While you can chalk it up to a little viewing of “Small Sample Size Theater,” the Heat are obliterating the 13.5 fastbreak points per game they averaged last season. The big reason for this is obviously the stalking duo of LeBron James and Dwyane Wade.

They treat the passing lanes like a pretty girl they noticed on Twitter and just had to know more about. They try to find them on Facebook, glean any information about location and workplace they can, follow the passing lanes on Foursquare to attempt to just “happen” into the same place one night. They follow them home and make notes about all of the entry points. They wait until nobody is home and then break in to steal the shoes and clothes from the passing lanes’ closet. They steal knickknacks to make a shrine of the passing lanes.

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