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Hardwood Compendium

Benjamin Polk —  October 25, 2012 — 7 Comments

Friends, lovers. If you like basketball it is essential for you to check out Hardwood Paroxysm’s ridiculously exhaustive, deeply metricized, lushly illo’d “Hardwood Paroxysm 2012/2013 Season Preview Guide.” This is a season preview I guess, but calling it that is kind of like calling Ulysses a nice, short story about Dublin. It contains: offseason transactions; salary numbers; efficiency stats; mini-essays; esoterically referential categories and categories about categories. It contains awesome sentences like this (under the heading of “Freakish Numbers and I Don’t Mean that Dirty Number 8″): “Just how much worse was Wesley Matthews at attacking the basket than in 2010-2011? 14.4% worse.”

Best of all, from where I sit, it contains much good work from our own Steve McPherson, including a nice little essay on our Wolves on page 77 (!), in which uses Schrodinger’s cat (that’s right) as a metaphor for Wolves’ multiple entangled possible futures. Check that out.

I have but one quibble. In his essay under the brutally appropriate category of “Doomsday vs. Manna From Heaven,” Jordan White has this to say: “It all starts with Ricky Rubio. Kevin Love may be Minnesota’s best player but Ricky Rubio is arguably the most important.” Whiiiich is true in its way, but only if Love avoids, say, breaking his hand doing knuckle pushups, missing the first 20 games of the year and possibly sinking the entire season. Anyway, have a look. I’ll see you in a week when you finally emerge from the wormhole.